Escape...

I am longing to esacape from the life I live
so, I sleep and dream about..the life I want to live...
without any thought I plunge into my subconscious
and shut.. the door... to the whole world of realities...to just outlive...
so, I sleep and dream about..the life I want to live...





In the sphere of my subconscious
I am the swayer
I am the creater, protector and destroyer...
Here..Everybody obeys me ..dances on my tunes
I am the taskmaster and others are goons..
I am not harsh...till respect I recieve
so, I sleep and dream about..the life I want to live...



I can swim in the river, and breath virgin breeze
I can trail on the mountain, and walk barefeet
I can sleep in the peace, and wake up a new
I can dance in the rain and catch all the drops of dew
So... beautiful my fanatasy is , so, hard to believe
so, I sleep and dream about..the life I want to live...



Here no one can make me cry, or make me small..
I am always smiling and standing above all..
no one to judge me no one to pass comment
I am certain to me everyone is benevolent...
no one to caste me off...no one to cage
so, I live here without fear and rage...
I have learned here to give and Forgive...
so, I sleep and dream about..the life I want to live...


But, Then....
When Sometime I wake up to reality
And I realise that I am living life as if it is just a formality..
No..Its not fault of real and reality
I have woven the fake world..and its a kind of abonormality...
I want to esacap and deny my actual world and where I belong...
I want to elude the the truth...and that's what is wrong...
Though...I know its Superficial what I percieve
But, still " I sleep and dream about..the life I want to live"

stirred and terrified.....

now there is whirlwind in my conscience
those departed sweet and sour memories
are returning... Just like.... life is coming to full circle
I am scared and standing with my all defences....to rebuff those adversaries
who made me feeble in the past...I was broken...
feelings were dead inside me....
I tried to gather pieces of my heart...though it was futile...
Everything was lost....
but still I live with those pitiful moments...
In my heart ...sealed and unspoken...
though once they made me soar in firmament...
and with my next breath I came down on earth...wounded
Just like the bird who's wings are slashed...but still alive
... Empty.. soundless.... and hollow...
I was dead inside..though breathing...and living in torment..
Days were lonely and nights were haunting...
as if I was lost in the dark forest of sorrows....disoriented
afraid of sunshine...as if it will consume me ...
hiding in the closet...as if the stares of people were too intimidating....
I was paranoid .....
but, then time heals all....
like Phoenix .. I took birth from ashes of my past.....
Buried all the feelings...and that consuming pain behind
Mended my broken heart.... with a fence of a secure wall...
and now..everything is coming back with U ...
what I left behind...what I couldn't end...
what I couldn't ignore...what I still feel
those all retentions erupting me and cutting me through..
I thought the wall was potent..U will not get through
But it was crushed with your one glance...
The wall is broken now...and U already pried in...
Now I am not able to snub U....
So, I am wound up....How I will face you?? stirred and terrified.....